Marriage
Little girls play house and dream of the day
when they grow up and marry Prince Charming
...When little girls grow up, Prince Charming
remains in their dreams.
Sometimes girls get physically intimate in relationships before they have committed to marriage with their "Prince"
Now, because of pregnancy, you might be thinking of marrying the father of your baby.
Maybe he is your Prince. Maybe he is not.
Getting married as a result of an unplanned pregnancy is not as popular as it was a number of years ago. Many young people were (and still are at times) pressured into marriage. Occasionally, marriages that begin like this can last happily ever after. The statistics, however, show us that 90% of teens who get married because of pregnancy will be divorced within six years. The percentage of divorces goes down slightly, the older the couple is when they wed.
Some will tell you that getting married is the only "right" or "responsible" thing to do. The father of the baby may feel that it is his duty to get married. You may feel at a loss and marriage may sound comforting and secure. Some will say that it is best for the baby to be born into a family with a mommy and a daddy who are married before the baby is born.
Marriage to the man or woman of your dreams is a wonderful blessing. But marriage is still a difficult relationship even in the best of circumstances. Learning to live unselfishly with a husband or wife and adding the responsibility of raising and supporting a child puts a tremendous amount of stress on a couple. If the marriage becomes filled with resentment, strife and arguing as the result of all the stress of marriage and child rearing, not one of the family members is well served. One partner will often look for a way out to find relief. Divorce seems like an easy cure.
A stable marriage provides a secure environment for children.
When their parents are living in a loving and harmonious relationship, the child will feel loved and secure. But marriage requires commitment for the long haul. Even the most mature and "in love" man and woman may one day fall "out of love" with the other. It requires commitment to stay together even when you don't feel like staying.
If you ar
e considering marriage, think through
some of the following questions:
Do you love the father of the baby?
Would he make a good father?
Do you have your own place to live separate from friends and family?
How does he treat you? (He will he likely treat your child the same.)
Is he someone you can always count on?
Does he show responsibility?
Did he graduate from High School? ...College?
How long does he stay at the same job?
Does he save money?
Does he pay his bills on time?
Does he make you feel good about yourself?
Can you see yourself married to him for the rest of your life?
Would you get married to him right now even if you were not pregnant?
and that you want to be married to him for the rest of your life,
take time to consider some other options.
You should consider these not just for your sake, but for the sake of your baby.
What about adoption?
What about single parenting?