Single parenting is becoming a very accepted pregnancy option in our world today. It does not carry the social stigmas it once did.  As a matter of fact, the majority of women experiencing an unplanned pregnancy choose single parenting. 

When thinking about this option, it's important to think about the years to come as well as the immediate future.

What is best for the baby now and in the future?
What is best for the mother and father over the years as well?

      What kind of questions would be helpful to think through as you consider becoming a single parent?

Do you have a place for you and your baby to live?
What financial resources do you have?

What do you hope to be doing in five years?
How can you foresee your future in 5 or 10 years if you choose to parent your child?

Have you finished your education? Is that important to you?

What type of career do you want?

Do you enjoy going out with friends?
Do you enjoy dating?
Do you hope to be married one day?

Do you have a support system of family or friends ?

We find that family and friends often say, while you are pregnant, that they are eager to baby sit and help you out.

    Ask these questions to see if that will be a reality:

• Do their schedules allow them to care for your child?
• How would you feel about any sacrifices they would be making on your behalf?
• How do they feel about helping when your child is a two year old?  or a 10 year old?

Now let's consider the children of single parents because ultimatly, the decision about marriage, single parenting and adoption should be made with the kiddo's best interest in mind.  We know that there are some terrific single parents out there with some happy, well adjusted children. We also know that there are some sad statistics regarding some children who are raised in single parent families .

Here is what some research reveals about the children of single parents:

• These children are six times more likely to live in poverty than those who grow up with two parents.¹

• Children of single parents have a 77 and 87 percent greater risk of being harmed by physical abuse and physical neglect respectively.³

These statistics do not mean that this will happen to your child, these only show that it does happen to some children.

The statistics regarding abuse and neglect are the most concerning.  It is quite easy for a single-mom to become overwhelmed with life and give less and less of her physical and emotional energy to her child.  Some single moms are not always available to protect her child from the harm of acquaintances or family members when she must leave her child in their care.  This can lead to the beginning of child abuse and neglect.

What are a few characteristics you might see in successful single parenting?

Strong physical and emotional support from extended family.

A loving, dependable, male figure who is in the child's life on a daily basis.

Dependable and adequate income.

A mom who is very nurturing, very patient, and who operates well on little sleep.

A mom who can successfully juggle school and/or work with her parenting responsibilities.

A mom who is willing to sacrifice an active social life.

When you come for counseling at Aggieland Pregnancy Outreach, we can explore these further as you look at your emotional and financial readiness to be a parent.  It's okay if you are not ready.  We can help you.  It is also helpful to discuss these issues with the people in your life who will be supporting you.  Early discussions will help you know who will be available to help you so you can confidently plan for your future.  At APO, we can help you look at important details so you can be prepared to stand confidently on your parenting choice for the rest of your life.

Take a look at marriage.

Talk a look at adoption.

Contact us

1. Pat Fagan, " How Broken Families Rob Children of their Chance for Future Prosperity," Heritage Backgrounder, No.1 June 11, 1999.
2. Denise F. Polit, Andrew S. London, John M. Martinez, : Food Security and Hunger in Poor, Mother-Headed Families in Four cities" ( Project on Devolution and Urban Change, Manpower Demonstration Research Corporation, 2000), p.2.
3. U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, The Third National Incidence Study of Child Abuse and Neglect ( Washington: Government Printing Office, 1996), p.xviii.
4. Jay Teachman et al., "Sibling Resemblance in Behavioral and Cognitive Outcomes: The Role of the Father Presence, " Journal of Marriage and the Family" 60 (1998): 835-848.